i kno i kno!we must have chated before lol~~~i hate myself for being so negative too.well normally i'm not..i'm always so positive.i just hate the "lows" n "highs".i wish my mood could be more stable...
You said you studied philosophy as a child, so, regarding your poem "Madness"
Neitzsche said "You solitary one, you go the way of the lover: you love yourself, and on that account you despise yourself, as only the lover can despise." Nietzsche observed the connection between respect and contempt, and said, “I love the great despisers, for they are the great venerators.” He also said something along the lines of 'one who despises oneself respects oneself for despising', can't find the exact quote.